Sometimes I cry so hard from pleading So sick and tired of all the needless beating
Profile Adeline!, 12021995 I felt that night, on the stage, incredibly close to everything in the universe, but also extremely alone. I wondered, for the first time in my life, if life was worth all the work it took to live. What exactly made it worth it? What’s so horrible about being dead forever, and not feeling anything, and not even dreaming? What’s so great about feeling and dreaming? — Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close Tagboard Exits 3e'10 Carissa Jermaine Sheree Talia Venessa Venetia Archives November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 Credits ©Glamouresque.	April 30, 2009 OH YA, i went to school with grace today. funny like hell. at first i thought she was ying ying, so i didnt care, until when we were at the platform, i saw her, LOL then she still gei gei dont want look at me lor. damn shit la. LOL. so yes. she was turning round and round in the mrt, i've got no idea why. HAHAHAHAHH. cos everyone are saying excuse me to her. and she got where to go but walk in circles. AHHAHAHA. super funny. and omg damn tiko la. ask me grab some chest hair from that bangla. omg. LOL. you go grab la!!! since he cut your queue. HAHAHAHA. omg laughed like crap. seriously manzxz. she rocks. and her plaids or wdv, is freaking tiny. :D nice. hahah. meet up soon yea!:D yoo. tests are finally over. i got a very very strong feeling i wont do well. but i cant do anything now. mom told me this morning, 'if need assessments all that, tell me.' then i was like. okay, i need them soon. seriously i need assessments, i need to study like mad. i find that studying is better than a lot of other things. so... yes, i think this is called no life. soo. school was alright. maths was okay. just so so, manageable la. so going obs:D i am happy. went home alone todayyyyyyyy. sian. so bored. a lot of things haven do, but i am still not doing-.- oh man. it went the wrong way. April 29, 2009 HIIII. currently using the house com. the keyboard is much much harder to type. LOL. yi lun wen a bit shit today. screwed up-.- so mood wasnt that good. until mdm chong cheered me up. LOL. by saying ' carissa, did you do sth to your hair today?' AHAHAHHA seriously hilarious. then omg we all broke into laughter. cos that time whole class wasnt there as they were glazing in the art room, so left... us, and... dunno who. LOL. so when she asked her, and we laughed, mdm chong was like, 'i dont understand why you all laughing at her..' OMG dumb. LOL. so charis, lyanne, sheree and i continued to laugh like mad. the mdm chong continue to ask, ' do you mind them laughing? do you know why are they laughing?' carissa: ' er...... *touch hair* er.. i think they find that its a funny question.' LOL OMG HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHA funny like MAD so after that, we kept laughing at her. LOL. soooooooo, last period of chi was shit-.- like wasting time only can. went opp with carissa and lyanne, ate then played. LOL. with pearls and prawn mee. we tried to poke the pearls with chopsticks and play. hilarious. LOL. so after that, we went back school and continued my art poster! :D quite alright... yea, i guess so. saw someone and someone. HAHAHAHA laughed even more. seriously funny. after 4.30, lyanne and i went home! LOL laughed like crap again. thennnnn, reached home. shall study maths ltr on, hope i wont screw it up tmr. no more turning back April 28, 2009 feel so demoralized, history is a goner paper, i think science too. for me though-.- so many questions wrong alr. whats the point of studying so hard? whats the point of waking up early on weekends just to revise my science through the ppt slides and copying down in a notebook? whats the point, i will probably end up getting some shit marks that is not worth the hard work. this is the first time i put in so much effort in studying. even in pri school, i didnt even self study, just finish all the assignments and thats it. i just hope the results wont disappoint me too much. if not, i will seriously bang the wall and die. you dont understand, anymore. April 27, 2009 YOOOO! today only left 24 ppl went to school! LOL. at first 27 i think, then 3 signed out cos fever. soooo. yea, left with 24. the class was super peaceful, damn shiok. then somemore the lessons all quite slack as the teachers cant do much. :D hahaha. pe was great. captain's ball was super funny i tell you. laugh until can die. LOL. anyway, my flu wasnt completely gone, my nose is still blocked-.- but i am feeling much much better after ytd's medicine! :D hmm. history was a goner. seriously, i spent so much time trying to memorising the stupid third port thingy, nvr even come out one-.- wth man. goner. the all the mcq, all tikam like mad. wth. die la. tmr sci also goner la. confirm. zzz. OH HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM:D glenn- you know when is mom's birthday? me- today lo. glenn- really? you buying sth? me- ya... no money, you? glenn- okay, buying cake.. me- oh, want share cost? glenn- nevermind, you no money right me- got, at home la, now dont have. glenn- then you pay me tonight lo me- okay can. LOL damn funny. when he asked 'really?', i feel like saying, 'nono! fake one' LOL. wth. my elder brother best, that time.. last week ah, msg my mom happy birthday alr. LOL. laughed like some crap. LOLOL. okok byee April 25, 2009 omg ppl, TAKE CAREEE. more and more ppl getting sick! i wonder how many ppl will turn up on monday. okay. i am alright lo, just that my nose is making my eyes tear! O: i dunno how it connected, anyway, is damn irritating, suddenly wil cry. LOL oh and coach is being an idiot, telling bgirls that we went to play, and that our parents called him and complained. wth man, since when. and he told them that we went to steal? joke of the day man. seriously. -.- monday last training, is damn stupid, when trainings suppose to stop, they dont stop, when they should not stop, they stop-.- after monday, that week all the tests finished alr. dot dot dot. heck ah. i studied sci! super happy. hahaha. tmr studying hist i guess. LOL. okok BYE. April 24, 2009 omg i think our class got some virus. 6 pp signed out today, lyanne, gerald, maxene, matthew, paul, joshia. all fever. omg. TAKE CARE!!! plus all the absent ppl, okky and matthias tan O: next week tests alr. must drink a lot of water yea. okay. now, i am falling sick. LOL though i keep saying my immune system is strong!! o.o my nose is dropping sooner or later. sneezed like mad. omg._. freakkkkkk anyway. today was boring without lyanne! :( soooo. chi test was alright. but i confirm got one wrong alr:( sian. nvm. hahaha. hmmmmmmm. chong's lessons were okay. and i am quite surprised i didnt fall aslp for these few day's lesson though i am feeling damn damn tired. didnt go for training, partly because of next week's tests, and i felt quite sick-.- sooo. i think i am going to go training after all the tests are over. okayy. i go do my maths. byeee. April 21, 2009 Tags- Lyanne- LOL noooo! so funny!. omg. LOLOL. carissa- LOL is too nice! must share with everyone! LOL. AHHAHAHAH. :D yes. Simin- AHHA best. tag with my name. HAHA. omg. is super nice okay. though is not singapre flyer, is just some construction thingy. grace- AHHAHAHAHA yes:D LOL. wth. i dont love butt-ocks. YOU then hor today was fine. rawr. chi compo was crap. LOL post next time. BYE. April 19, 2009 guess which is my bro! :D omg man. i saw this when i was flipping through my pri sch report book. OMG-.- centre parting. AHHA LOL according to someone( i forgot who), i was posing a great shot-.- nice or not! :D carissa huang! and her lime green skinnies! army there the food! :X (didnt eat much-.-) YOO. went library with kns today:D okay didnt really did alot of work. but at least we finished our mindmap. :D ahahah. and we have loads of fun. laughed like MAD. as usual:D heh. farnaye. anyway, went home at around 4 plus. then... reached home. did somemore work. thats all. ltr doing dnt board. i am still having muscleaches!!! :( thats bad. and as i said, you will get back everything you gave me April 18, 2009 grace- PI ah me- LOL AHHAHA i thought why you miss the maths PI so much grace- Pi as in pi gu de pi you know, ni xia mian de na liang kuai rou omg man. hilarious. i was looking at chat log, and saw this. LOLOL. farnaye. hahah okay i shouldnt be here posting-.- tags yingning- ahhahaha! welcome! :D grace- ahahha. you dont say me lor. you also :( same hereeee rawr charis- ahahah were got la. i very happy liao okay. HAHAHAH YA YIN:D LOLOL. seriously damn funny, then the part we tricked lyanne was the best la. LOL her face! AHAH cassandra- HIII yutong- LOL yes THAT short-.- omg man. ahhaha lyanne- LOL rhectorical question ah. tag my blog ask me question, ownself answer LOLOL carissa- DONT SAD LA! you can try again one! haven end of year! jiayou! jerm- LOL /25 la! omg /100 i still so happy, i not adeline seah alr. LOLOL. omg ya not bad IMPROVED. clap for you :D omg today is crazy. only 4 sec 2s went to training, if i knew that would happen, i shouldnt have went-.- plus training was torturous. i nearly died. plus ytd's muscleaches. seriously. DYING. -.- and that wh. zzz la train setting like madddd. got one is squat half way one LOL. oh and he punished me to hop the whole basketball court. omg man. damn freaking pain. thennnn. fall out, coach talked to me, say i these few days like very weird? -.- zzz. tired what. somemore so many hw wtf. confirm will stress right zzz. anyway, went opp to buy big gulp. went home alone. reached homeee. bathed, did some work. i finished eng ass book! okay thats only like one work-.- zzz. okay nvm bye. April 17, 2009 HI i am finally posting. anyway, today was fine i guess? very tired, thats all. school was boring as usual. oh! and my chi compo got some prize O:! crystal toh too. hahahaha. so funny. got another one coming up also, then charis was like laughing at me! in the end she also need:D hahah. then okay mdm chong is sucha loser lor. seriously, she is like air talking every day O: damn LOL. hmmmmmmmmm. training was rather tiring. like really. jian ping and i did setting like mad. and we did physical O: 20 kg of weight. super crazy. i can only do quick bar! cant do arm curl though. so funny la. LOL. when everyone tried to lift it up, we all gave the constipated face. LOL omg. ahahhaha! then played some match. super annoying. cos after taking the weights. my arms cant even lift up la. wtg... zzz. went home with esther and jocelyn. then slept for like half an hour on the sofa. -.- then bathed, ate. watched tv. LOL. and theres some good news from yutong. LOL.. okay yea. byeeee. tmr got training again-.- April 16, 2009 HI. tmr got gong han test... hais. sian. oh my maths got 24:D happy hahaha. so tired already, shall post a proper post soon, not now. so many freaking work to do. zzz April 15, 2009 OMG i am so tired today. and i dont feel like blogging, i haven do any work and i feel so uncomfortable-.- lololol. okay off to do work and sleep. April 13, 2009 SIAN. OKAY LOL. training is boring today anyway, my dream was hee-leh-lious-.- LOLOLOL. seriously how can that ever happened. anyway. tmr i am going to be pangseh-ed i feel damn SAD. LOL......... this is so ridiculous. how can just one syf makes the dancers not come to school!!! so unfair lor.... sian. DAMN SIAN -.- mdm chong dunno doing what sia. LOLOLOL. like boring la. ZZZ LOL. now she going some TA to find help. 'i will be up shortly' i am sure, shortly. LOL. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. wth, nothing to do la. what is there to say. April 12, 2009 YOOO. today was alright? erm. did my work. and i feel like watching corner with love again. LOL. seriously damn nice eh:D ahahah. anyway, i think i dont have the time, maybe holidays borrow again. heh heh. damn boring. got so many work to do, yet i dont feel lke doing. bleah. byeeee. 因为你，所以幸福 April 11, 2009 牵手或放手.幸福.或祝福 oooooolala. i watched finish the vcd! :D and is super nice. last night i kept thinking abt it la. omg-.- hahaha. and the ending is nice:D so touchinggg. hahaha. and they are so sweet(: anyway, woke up at 530 today-.- sent bro off to his NS training. ooo. took like one hour train ride to pasir ris, then took boat to pulau tekong. -.- 'tour' around that ulu place. finally, can go home. and bro has cut his hair. LOL ytd. super funny. botak omgggg. LOLOL. farnaye. anyway, he will be away for like 2 weeks. no one will help me take fish! O: hahah. hope he will enjoy there manzx. and come back with loads of muscles. LOL. OH OH, he is the shortest among his platoon. like LOL la. seriously shortest eh. O.O slept on the way back, then... did my eng. done! left with maths.. and chi? i dunno la. LOL. sian. i go liaooo. byezx. April 10, 2009 yoo. i dont know whats wrong with my internet explorer. what dial connection. zzz. anyway, i slacked the whole day, watch the vcd. LOL. from afternoon to night eh. so touching O: LOL. quite sad la. anyway, bro going NS tmr, so not going training. 530 need to wake up eh-.- sian. dont know what to post la. nth to do. dunno got what hw also-.- lols.. bye 希望能把我的想念折成纸飞机，让它飞到你那里。 April 9, 2009 omg i am damn sleepy. i am going to fall aslp anytime. O: today was alright, hmmm. didnt have mass run, so did nth-.- maths test was wth. quite alright, but i got one careless mistake! SHIT. 500-240=200-.- wth man. damnittt. nvm. i hope that will be the only wrong answer. then history. went library. then recess! i am broke. like damn hell broke-.- so eat a little. sci, ros ho didnt come, so relieft teacher came, asked us discuss abt the.. sex talk thingy-.- we ended up talking abt other stuffs, as usual. then.. design! muahahha. i went to heat my acrylic again. and now, is okay alr! :D:D:D happy. ahahha. then.... sex talk. omg i slept-.- is so boring! cos we were in the LT. so like.. cannot see real person or anything. boring. then. ate with kns. okay, nono, kns-3 ppl. LOL. only charis and sheree. then went up play monkey again. LOL so fun. ytd's more fun. hahaha. anyway. 2.4 was alright, paced with lyanne. and she ran very fast. but our timings are still the same in the end! :D ahhaha. 13.29:D happy. waited for carissa they all, then went home with them. tired man. RAWR. moodswings these few days-.- April 7, 2009 YOO. today was fine. cant wake up:( reached school............... chi was fine? i dunno, dont care. then chapel. slept-.- maths olympiad was a killer. LOL. really can die. i nearly fainted. -.- went for recess. ate, went uppp. SCIENCE was a killer too. i totally dont understand what mrs ho talking about. what electrolysis sai. i dunno. before the lesson, everyone were like quite enthu about it la, then all prepared the pens and papers, LOL. until like half hour, everyone gave up and just sit there and stoned. LOL. super funny. okay everyone, refers to only, sheree, charis, carissa, me, joanna, jamie? meipeng? the back part of classroom la. LOLOL la. damn funny. then.. eng-.- chong was blabbering away, and no one listening cos we were occupied with our coms. hahahaha. so yupp, left class early for prize presentation, and support cboys. watched cedar and anderson, omggggggggggggggggggggg:( we could have been there playing against cedarr:( cedar is the overall champs. grats:D then cheered for the guys. they lost, but still better than us... took our medals, and went back. tired. ltr going study for spelling and feichangyuedu. sianzxz. OH AND MY HISTORY GOT 18. I AM SO HAIRPEE:D i miss the times:( tags- Charis- LOLOL. yea right, is left with 5 ppl. how great. haha anyway thanks:D you too yea:D AND shuddup. LOL stop ego-ing! O: haha hope la.. hope wont fall apart._. yutong- HAHA YEA. you stm ah, told me like.. few days ago O: ahhahaa weird dream Grace- hahah, i am not! you owe me one ah, kit kat and mars bars. :D and yes, better call me soon. if not i slaughter youuuu >:D Sheree- okay.. no la, not your fault anyway, i was just writing out my feelings, thats all. same here too:D Yingning- hahaha sure. no la, your skills are better! (: jiayou for next year! LOL my song very sad? hahah. Alex- hahaha. yea.. everything no more liao. sad:( need to wait till 2011... Jermaine- LOL i love you spiker! (: April 6, 2009 today was fine i guess, spent like 2 hours in the art room to finish my clay work, myself-.- LOL. so like yea, finished. then saw lungs, chatteddd. went home with lyanne. omg tmr is the finals for both girls and guys, JIAYOU CBOYS! you all can do it yo:D ahahha and omg celestine, good luck! though fmss cgirls 09 is not the one playing the finals, i am feeling somehow nervous. LOL. maybe nervous for celestine. hahahh. anw, yea, good luck for all the teams:D hope tmr can get a pic of cgirls again(: oh no. everything reminds me of you all. we will be back and fight again in 2011, let's wait patiently.... :( April 4, 2009 yo. photos are posted on redsports alr. omg-.- LOL. read everything and felt sad and regretful. duno how to describe the feeling, but it isnt good. why does everything has to end so quickly? not even allowing us to realise the wrong we had done. making us regret like mad. is this the only solution? i really hope this clique wont fall apart. i know sometimes i am in the wrong too. im sorry. i have been tolerating lots of things, but no one is listening. yet everyone are venting. i am always the one, i am not saying anyone. but is just that i am tired. tired of tolerating. is tiring, having to do that, and coping with studies as well as vball. i really want to concentrate on my studies now, and i really hope nothing will happen to any one of us. April 3, 2009 HI. we lost to shuqun today. and is okay cgirls(: though i regretted, not being fast enough, not able to take loads of balls, i cant possibly reversed back and play again right, even if i want to, i would choose to reverse back to cedar's match.. anw, reserves were field today, and i hope everyone is happy with the results? no matter what la.. so yupp, i am glad to have this team. really, from a team, when i dont have confidence in winning, to a team, that ALMOST got into finals. and is in nats top4. i am really proud of this team:D since i am free, i decided to post sth(: Alex: yooooo. hi. although you were not able to play with us for the few nationals matches, i am really glad that you were in the team. after you were banned by coach or wdv, i missed your voice, you made the team much more alive. but whatever reason, i hope you wont transfer cca/school. and hope you wont lose anymore things! (: Cassandra: HI. dont be sad over the last match yea, whats over is over. just be happy that you were in a team without any conflicts. i really hope no one has any regrets. so yea, jiayou, fight for a place in bgirls! Esther: haha HI. you must have confident in yourself man. must believe that you are really good, and can make it! and yes, you alr proved to us, that is the last match, you played well, and your defence is good(: same for you too, dont give up easily! and there will be a place for you next year!:D Hui Hui: yooo. a quiet and not so enthu girl. LOL. yes, sometimes we were angry with you, cos you dont want to chu sheng and sth else, but your performance on cedar's match was quite good! at least you chu sheng, and encourage ppl! next year's cgirls depends on you, jiayou! and lead the team yo. Jermaine!(captain yo) HIII. a great captain, and a funny one:D hahaha. your skills are oh-so-awesome, and i regretted not setting the balls well for you. but no more chance alr, is there? you are always the one leading us! and when you are feeling no good, the team will be somehow no mood to play too. so yes! you are super important to us, and even when you were sick, you came and play the match. (: good luck for next year. and there will be, definitely a place for you:D Jia Hui and Jia Le(vice capt) YO HAMBURGER and VICE CAPT. hahaha. great to know you 2! you all are awesome ppl, who are so funny! and you all really improved a lot ever since under 13. keep on going yea, theres chance for you all. must have confident! :D and you all will succeed. JIAYOU:D Jing Hui: hi! the most confident girl :X ahhaha. anw, can see you alr tried your best in the match. so dont brood over it! continue to have the attitude of 'i-can-do-it' :D and your setting is really nice, fight for the setter place yea!!:D hahaha Jocelyn: tallie yo. you might not be in the main 12, but you are definitely one of us. put in more effort in the trainings, and you can do it! so tall omg. ahhaah. jiayou okay! (: Simin: YO. hahha. the best attitude among us:D i know, you will still feel a little sad not getting into finals, who wont? but what is most important is, we know that we really tried our bests, and is the best game we ever played. so theres no need to regret! you played really well in all the matches, and i dont know why you said you off form! O:! ahhaa anw, good luck for next year, no matter what happened:D Yingmin: HI. though you are unable to go with us for the last few matches, you are always supporting us(: glad to have you in the team. and i really hope that you wont transfer school or cca too. cos, you are one of us, and will always be(: good luck for everything you do okay! jiayou(: Ying Ning: hello!! great to know you! a so cute junior. ahhahah. okay it feels weird when i say junior, cos you are taller than me a lot a lot. and you played so well:D doesnt seemed to be a junior to me! or rather, a good friend that is same age as me, and plays better than me O: hahahaha. next year also must lead the cgirls! you can do it yo:D hahaha jiayou! and glad that you are always smiling and happy all the time. ahahha sorry if some are short. ahhaa loss for words. cgirls 09 will always be the best team yea:D April 2, 2009 yo... not a good day.. i guess. still feeling a little sad.. cant help it i guess? hais. and great, cboys went into finals. i am jealous of them.. :( i have never played finals before, until i came fmss vball. zonals.. but nvr get champion before, i guess, our chance of getting it just slipped off our hands. whats ours is ours.. :((((((( alright, must recover! before tmr.. and lets do it again cgirls! JIAYOUUU. and let the last match of cgirls 09 to be a memorable one.. thanks to 'kns' who have been trying to cheer me up yo. thanks. guess it helped. oh, and our new ezlink sucks-.- damnit. the phot is so damn ugly! O: arghhh. and theres a relief teacher who came in during sci. and looks like an alien to me :X anwwwww. did dnt, and is kind of fun. my product is.. ALMOST done:D but my clay isnt-.- so.. maybe next monday or tue gonna do.. who going do with me?! sianzzx. after school, met yutong, and went to eat subwayyy. went home after that. haha. going do hw ltr on. super duper SIAN-.- April 1, 2009 april's fool day. the most cruel joke ever. dont even have the mood now. sorry cgirls, i know i didnt play well today. i am really sorry. it hurts so much when everyone start to break down. sorry cgirls, we failed to play the finals as cgirls09. right now, theres only one way for us. let's ping for the match on friday, and get 3rd for the school. jiayou okay.. do our very best(: the fact hurts so much, the fact that we lost to them so many times. is partly my fault that we lost. i am sorrrrryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
But baby, where they knock you down and out Is where you oughta stay