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Sometimes I cry so hard from pleading
So sick and tired of all the needless beating
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Adeline!, 12021995I felt that night, on the stage, incredibly close to everything in the universe, but also extremely alone. I wondered, for the first time in my life, if life was worth all the work it took to live. What exactly made it worth it? What’s so horrible about being dead forever, and not feeling anything, and not even dreaming? What’s so great about feeling and dreaming? — Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close Tagboard
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May 12, 2009
today is the worst day ever. though i anticipate today very much since obs. i hate today. firsttt. science screwed me upside down. okay forget it. nono. chinese first. it wasnt up to my target. so yea. kind of disappointed? then no chapel, so was class contact then maths olympiad-.- is like boring until can rot. so i nearly slept. plus i was like super hungry. is damn damn boring. then ate, science-.- gave back our freaking papers. so yes, forget it. then eng, mdm chong was kind enough to gave us some chocolate thingo. anyway, after that was some speech. is damn freaked up. i wasnt prepared, and i need to present tmr to the whole class. how great. wtf. nvm. history was shit. is super boring, and i dont know what the hell that joel loke was talking about. i want mrs wong to come back. so yes, oral. after that, went home. told my mom about results, first about sci. then talked about chi. at first i thought she would be quite happy. in the end, when she heard abt the 49. FORTY NINE UPON FIFTY. her face changed straight away i tell you. she was like, ask you read dont want read, everyday in front of the computer, do you think got use? ppl read a lot more than you, you dont think your chi standard very high. i was like ?! when did i say my chi standard was good, when did i sit in front of the computer whole day and not read anything. you know how much effort i put in to chinese? dont understand, then dont say any shit like i never read. yes, maybe i didnt read as much. i dont deny that. but i did put in effort. and like what the hell can i do if that cheena hates me? you tell me what the hell can i do lah. i ask you. 49/50, for chinese paper you know. how the hell can you get that. ppl use your brains. i wont believe the paper is so well written until i read it with my own eyes. some kind of bitches. i kept asking myself, how the hell can i push my grades up. HOW? and why is it that the effort i put in is ALWAYS not enough, be it volleyball or studies. i am always the one, getting scolded, punished, being the lousiest. what is this? i am so sick of this. |
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But baby, where they knock you down and out
Is where you oughta stay |
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